DEMOCRATS

 1) Refuse to stand up to the Palestinians.  There will never be peace in the middle east as long as Yassir Arafat and other terrorists are not fully and universally condemned.  Even the slightest bit of softness or compassion for terrorists perpetuates their horrible acts and inspires followers.

2) Stand up for illegal aliens.  Illegal aliens have nothing to do with immigrants.  Illegal aliens have nothing to do with race.  Illegal aliens have to do with people who violate laws.  None should ever be rewarded with benefits, none should ever be given citizenship.  The argument that we all were immigrants is an argument against this practice, because law-abiding, process-following immigrants have nothing to do with law-breaking illegal aliens.

3) Continue to see “the rich” as some evil, alien creatures to be bilked, while refusing to admit that lots of poor people are poor because they actually are lazy and have the wrong priorities and values.

4) Prefer to whine a lot rather than do what is necessary to make things better.

5) Show a lack of respect for good Judeo/Christian family values types.  There is nothing wrong with people who get married, go to church on Sunday, and have conservative social values.  Even if they are white and live in the mid-west.

6) Treat minorities like a commodity.  There is only one type of person in this country:  Americans.

7) Have no respect for people who disagree with feminism.  Women should have equal rights and protections, but that doesn’t mean every woman should focus on a career above a family or be assertive and aggressive.  Just as women should have a right to a career and to be assertive and aggressive, true feminism has respect for their right to act in traditionally feminine ways.

8) Make your dope smoking habits a top political priority.  Attack conservative values like monogamy.  Flaunt and taunt hedonistic things, like bisexuality, drug use, and open sexuality in front of others.  There is nothing wrong with any of these things, but other people have a right to not have to have them shoved in their faces.

REPUBLICANS

 1) Have no economic plan except what good Republicans once called “Voodoo Economics.”  Trickle-down never does trickle-down, it simply takes everyone’s tax money and puts it in the hands of CEOs.  Republicans say these CEO’s will be benevolent with this, give us good jobs, and this will fix everything.  CEO’s are not boy scouts, corporations exist to create shareholder/owner profits, not jobs.  No company will every create needless jobs just because they have extra money from tax cuts.  Stop pretending CEO’s are boy scouts and have the public interest as their primary concern.  It is nonsense.

2) Try to break down the wall between church and state.  Not a single dollar should ever be taken from a taxpayer and given to a religious institution that says he is a sinner and will be condemned to hell.  Think:  school vouchers alone would take money from Christians and send it to Jewish schools, that say Jesus was just another man, and Muslim schools; take money from Jewish people and send it to Catholic and Protestant schools that say Jews will burn in hell and to Muslim schools that say Jews should burn on Earth.  And Muslims will have money taken from them and given to Christian schools that say they are sinners who will burn in hell and Jewish schools which say they should burn on earth.  Giving tax money to “faith-based” charitable programs would do exactly the same.

3) Refuse to accept that a high quality, free-public education system is in the nation’s best interest.  Yes, some poor people are poor because they are lazy and have the wrong priorities and values, but not giving people with the right drive, priorities, and values the chance to extricate themselves from poverty leads to despair, which leads to a permanent cycle of crime and undermines the security and prosperity of the nation.

4) Choose to run unqualified puppet candidates so that a handful of people behind the scenes can truly run the country.  This doesn’t work out in the end, because in the end, the ignorant, unqualified puppet is the one who must provide the leadership and make the final decisions.

5) Embrace racism and sexism.  Sorry, the boy scout front you put on is transparent.  Stop embracing racism or no good American can ever support you.

6) Embrace lying.  If you don’t understand how in the end lying just makes things worse, and how without the truth nothing good can be accomplished, and how lying is simply morally wrong and against good American values, you are not a party good Americans can ally with.

7) Support bullying, free-speech squelching media outlets.  Free and fair discourse is the basis of democracy.  As long as you embrace the Rush Limbaughs and FOX Newses of the world, you show an antipathy for democracy and basic American values.

8) Try to force a dishonest, hypocritical value set on everyone in the nation.  Pre-marital sex has always happened.  Smoking pot is not shooting heroine.  Someone with a drug problem is no worse than someone with an alcohol problem.  Homosexuals are a fact of nature and always have and will exist.  And none of what other people do in regard to any of these things is your business anyway.  They are personal matters for free Americans to deal with in their own ways.